Okay that was fun but now it’s back to the grindstone for me 8’)
I’LL SEE YOU SUCKERS ON THE FLIP SIDE OF FINALS. >B( *salutes*
GODSPEED TO YOU SOLDIERS.
god seriously everything you said just hrrrghhhh god takes deep breaths
SCREAAMMMSSS NOOOOOO NONONONONONONONO fhhnngnggg SOBBING
oh man no I seriously lost what I’d said. I could be way off with what I’m thinking but that’s the way it loOKS like it’s heading to me. And it’s like on the one hand EXCITEMENT BECAUSE OF PLOT AND INTERESTING NEW EXPLORATIONS OF PERSONALITY AND CONFLICT but on the other much-too-invested-in-an-oc-than-I-should-be side it’s like GOSH NO BABY WHAT HAVE YOU DONE. THIS IS NOT GOOD GO BACK REWIND REDO
I think the saddest part though is that Spook was all alone in this. I know he doesn’t talk about the demon with anyone. But it didn’t initially seem to be about the demon so much as him feeling really lost and confused. And it doesn’t seem like he tried to reach out to Rocky or One at all about it - he just retreated into himself and stewed in it (which probs didn’t help hhh) and that’s like REALLY SAD TO ME. Like he’s going through the worst funk he’s been in in probably months and he’s just so alone. No one to help him but the demon. And that’s the crazy thing - I don’t know what the deal was but I get his decision too. It felt aptly motivated. And I’m still really curious about whether or not he was on meds when it went down - if One hadn’t taken them at all during the bodyswap or Spook had stopped so he could FEEL something again and that’s when he started seeing the demon again. But mostly I’m just sad because he was so so so vulnerable, so much so that he gave in to the thing he’d been hiding from behind a MASK for years.
I DN’T UNDERSTAND WHAT MY FEELINGS ARE DOING TANNYYYGHHH *DRAGS HANDS DOWN FACE* I DON’T KNOW EITHER I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS BUT I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT MY EMOTIONS ARE SO I CAN’T STUFF THIS INTO WORDS *disgruntled whale noise*
Spook definitely seemed down after getting back to his body, and I had SERIOUSLY BEEN REALLY INTERESTED, in how being in One’s brain affected his attitude, and WAS ONE KEEPING UP WITH SPOOK’S MEDS DURING THE SWAP??, AND I WAS CURIOUS TO SEE HOW SPOOK’d take being back in his skin, but I wasn’t expectING WHATEVER THIS THING THAT IS HAPPENING TO HAPPEN AAAAAA, oh womp I should have just put the tags int he post, i found some of the words for some of the emotions a little sORTA.
YES. A;SDLFKJasldf i just….he seemed to almost settle out and FUCK i hadn’t thought of the meds and One bless his heart seems like a pretty forgetful nub and just i don’t…know….and i’m scared and worried and where the fuck is this going and i’m really really concerned because Spook has never replied to asks the way he is now i feel like, at least not that i know of or have heard of where he’s chill and almost eerily peaceful like ‘yeah dude i’m fine’ and ‘nah don’t what you’re talking about’ and WHERE DI THAT FUCKING BLOB GO WHAT HAPPENED
YES OH MY GOSH THAT’S THE MOST UNSETTLING PART - HE’S SO FUCKING CALM. THat’S THE SCARIEST THING ‘CAUSE IT’S LIKE YOU KNOW SHIT went down sorry I forgot I was holding the caps button omfghsldkfj but yeah it FEELS off kilter. On top of everything else. sfkjdfj
BWA BUT I WH-
WHAT IF Spook wanted to feel again. I mean, I know he DOES but what if that’s what blobmonsterspookmastfacewhateverDEMON DUDE gave him? An opportunity to live without needing the drugs to keep himself on track - pseudo normalcy? But the ‘servitude’ is allowing the demon to take over whenever the demon wants? Just - demon in control of Spook doing whatever kind of damage he’s into idk man and what if Spook blacks out during that time - OR what if Spook’s aware but not in command and what if the demon hurt someone and Spook enjoyed it or - I - or if the demon just whispered stuff in his ear like okay, drop what you’re doing and go do this thing whether or not you want to - I just-
*covers mouth and thinks this through*
I DN’T UNDERSTAND WHAT MY FEELINGS ARE DOING TANNYYY
GHHH *DRAGS HANDS DOWN FACE* I DON’T KNOW EITHER I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS BUT I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT MY EMOTIONS ARE SO I CAN’T STUFF THIS INTO WORDS *disgruntled whale noise*
